As a parent, divorcing from your partner is a huge decision and one which is not taken lightly. A potentially very stressful time for both you as parents and your children, it’s vital that the divorce process is handled professionally and quickly, so here are 5 things that you may wish to consider. 

Finding the right divorce lawyer

Even the most amicable divorces are often best conducted by experienced solicitors such as Slater Heelis. A reputable divorce lawyer will be able to advise you on how best to proceed in order to minimize the impact on your children whilst also ensuring that all parties get what they are owed. Having a solicitor on your side can also help you to vocalise difficult topics such as those about money or property and will mediate any arguments that could occur.

Decide who your children will live with

Separating from your partner will mean deciding who receives primary custody of your children and ultimately will decide who they live with. Custody battles can be emotional and scarring for all parties involved and so it’s vital that this decision is made in private and with the utmost professionalism. Unless your children are at risk, remember to leave your own feelings and grievances behind to make the best decision for your children even if this means giving up custody to your partner.

Will you need to move home?

Sometimes a divorce will involve moving home but this can be unsettling and disruptive for children of all ages. Children need routine during their young and more fragile years and moving them away from their friends and other family members can be hard for them to understand. If possible, try to stay in your family home, or if you must move then move locally so that your children can still attend their school and socialise with their friends – don’t underestimate the support that a child’s school and friends can have at this time.

How do you speak about your ex-partner?

As a parent, you are likely already aware of how much your children’s little ears can pick up and listen to, which is why it’s so important not to slander or bad mouth your partner in your children’s presence regardless of how stressed or upset you may be. Try to keep arguments between you and your partner private and to maintain neutral language around your children to stop them from feeling uncomfortable or from picking up on your negative language. Once again this is a time to leave your own feelings at the door and to do what is best for your children.

Should your children see a counsellor?

For children of all ages, a divorce can be a very tough time and regardless of whether they show it or not they may be hurting on the inside. It can be hard for children to understand and deal with their emotions and so it is worth considering whether they could benefit from a few sessions with a counsellor or therapist who can help them to understand what they are feeling and how best to deal with it.