A Mothers Right To Choose
Or is it?
When you become pregnant for the first time there suddenly becomes so many new things to think about. Nothing is about you any more, it all becomes about the baby, what is best for baby, what is right and wrong, what type of parent do you want to be, it’s never ending and it doesn’t stop once you have baby. If anything it gets worse!
All mums to be start planning in advance, making decisions, deciding on things like disposable or cloth nappies, home/water/hospital birth, pain medication or nothing at all, dummies or nothing and so on.
The lists and extensive preparation can be exhausting but completely worthwhile if it all goes to plan. Because as we are all aware babies very rarely go along with plans.
What if it all goes awry? If your birth and first days of motherhood don’t go to plan? What can or do you do? Do you change it all? Do you scrap it and go one day at a time? Or do you adapt?
Before baby arrives there is one choice you need to make. The most important choice. How are you going to feed your baby?
We all know breast is best! It’s the most natural way to feed your baby. The best way, easy way, the only way…..
Of course breastfeeding your newborn is what your body is designed to do, what it is supposed to do,
But what if it doesn’t happen the way it is supposed to? You can’t express any or enough. What if your body can’t do it? Are you supposed to suffer in the pursuit of being a ‘good’ mum, is your baby supposed to go hungry because they aren’t being satisfied?
Yes you can choose to persevere, to plough on regardless for fear of being branded a bad mum for giving up.
But why should doing what is best for you be so wrong? Being a new mum is hard whether it is your first or fifth baby. Choosing how to feed your baby should be a personal choice and no one should be made to feel inferior if they want or need to bottle feed their newborn.
All mums should be encouraged to ultimately do what is best for them and baby as an unhappy and unhealthy mum is no good to anyone and if giving baby a bottle resolves an unhappy situation shouldn’t that be what is important. A happy mum and a well fed baby is a much more preferable scenario I think.
Now don’t get me wrong, I do agree with breastfeeding absolutely. Everyone should be given all the information, practical and emotional support to encourage breastfeeding where possible. It is the natural and best way to feed and nourish your baby. What I don’t agree with is mums being berated, looked down on if they don’t want to or can’t breastfeed. We should be encouraging them to find what is ultimately a solution if this is the case and forcing them into carrying on and persevering isn’t the way to do it.
I didn’t choose to breastfeed my daughter. I had my reasons and situations occurred that made me decide that personally bottle feeding was the right choice for us. Do I feel like I’ve missed out on the bonding with my daughter due to not breastfeeding? No I don’t. Would I do anything differently if I could do it all over again? No I don’t think I would. My daughter has grown up to be a happy, healthy independent young lady who has a healthy appetite, no allergies, no health problems and we are really close.
I know all mums are different and all of us experience different emotions with regards to our choice of feeding our babies. Each emotion and feeling is unique to them. All experiences and information should be shared freely so we can all make the best informed decision we can. And if that decision is different to yours…….
- Please don’t judge
- Encourage, help and support others choices
If you are struggling with breastfeeding, or struggling to make the decision for or against, I hope this helps but what ever you decide the choice is yours and yours alone. Make it, be strong and ignore anyone who tells you otherwise because no one knows your body or your baby better than you!
*I appreciate all comments and I love learning about peoples personal experiences. This is my personal view towards breastfeeding, I am not anti or for a certain way of feeding I am pro mum please bare this in mind when commenting.*