Fiction: The Secrets of Saltlake, After the beach

girl-standing-on-beach-for-a-short-fiction-story-called-the-secrets-of-saltlake for a post about my writing journey

If you are here to catch up in the next instalment of my Secrets of Saltlake series, thank you! I am still loving this series so far and at the time of writing this, I have ideas bursting out of everywhere. My fingers can’t type fast enough to keep up with them so I hope it is starting to make sense. If you would like to you can read the first instalment The Secrets of Saltlake before this one or you can read this and decide if you like it before reading the other part. This series currently has 4 parts but I’m thinking 6 will fill in the gaps nicely. I have written the next part and the last instalment so I need 2 more to complete the story I think.

I’m thinking I should have kept this all to one side as a novella but when I wrote the first piece I didn’t have any clue how or where it would take me. So as I have done before I am making it into a series just for my readers. As always, any feedback and constructive criticism welcome.Β 

The Secrets of Saltlake: After the Beach.

Ariel had been in contact with her dad straight after the beach incident. Jonny had tried to talk to her in the car about it but she changed the subject. She knew she sounded like those vacuous cheerleaders she had met on the squad whose lives revolved around their sport and their social lives. She never wanted to be like them and Jonny knew she wasn’t. Brianne was a cheerleader and one of her oldest friends. Yet cheerleading to her, although her passion was the route to a scholarship to follow her dreams. That girl was headed somewhere.

But still, Ariel waffled on about how she couldn’t wait to see the girls and she wondered had Emma spoke to Steve, the editor of the school newspaper and blog since their date last Friday. She couldn’t help herself. She had to free her mind to converse with her dad and show him what had happened yet she couldn’t just ignore Jonny. She could feel him freaking out behind his calm exterior. As a quarterback she knew he was level headed and reliable under pressure, she had seen that many a time whilst cheering him on from the bleachers. But never before had she picked up on his fear like she was now.

She gave his hand a squeeze as he reached for her from the driving seat. Eyes fixed firmly on the road, his jaw was clenched and she could tell he was grinding his teeth. The sun had caught his face and gave a glow to his healthy Mediterranean complexion. Jonny’s family were Sicilian and despite not having visited Β Sicily since he was a young boy, he still carried the characteristics of heritage with him respecting not only his elders and their traditions but also his olive eyes and jet black hair gave him that irresistible Italian look all the girls at school swooned over.

The drive was taking forever. Usually, it didn’t take so long but it seems the whole of Saltlake had been at the beach and after that ferocious explosion of purple lightening in the sky, it seemed everyone had decided to leave pretty quick too. Jonny rapped his fingernails against the steering wheel. The nervous energy building up inside was too much to bear it felt like it was going to explode from inside him any second.

His cool exterior was fooling no one he thought to himself as he stared at the traffic building up on the little dirt road ahead of him. You would think by now Saltlake would have made a proper asphalt road or something in and out to the beach but the mayor voted against it saying it would ruin the charm and the landscape or the little fishing town. So the dirt road remained, as did the ever increasing line of cars and 4×4’s trying to exit all at the same time.

Ariel’s voice snapped him back to the present. She was still wittering on about Emma and Steve. He had spoken to Steve yesterday. They didn’t usually hang out but they had 3rd period English together and Jonny thought if he was going to be dating one of Ariel’s friends he may as well get to know the guy. He did really like Emma and was taking her out for dinner tonight. That’s why we were going to meet them. But he still couldn’t shake this feeling inside him that something was really really wrong and Ariel knew a damn sight more about the purple and the lightening than she was letting on.

She could discuss her friends and the upcoming volleyball tournament at school all she wanted but Jonny was determined to find out what it was she wasn’t telling him and his resolve hardened as he returned the squeeze of her hand interlocking their fingers as he gently kissed her pink polished fingernails.

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

Lucy At Home

If you are enjoying this series so far then please pop your details below to be kept up to date with how the story is progressing and when the next instalment will be live.

Spread the love
  • 2

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

  1. More great writing Tracey. I love how you have captured Jonny’s demeanour. I am very intrigued about the purple lightening. Fabulous! Thank you for linking to Prose for Thought x

  2. This is great! I love the idea of publishing a story in installments. Now I’ll have to catch up with the first installment! #KCACOLS

  3. Ooh this is amazing, you are so talented! Will make sure to read the next instalment! #kcacols

  4. Well now I’m intrigued and need to go and read the rest! Fab bit of writing! x #KCACOLS

  5. You already know that I LOVE this new series Tracey! It’s so well written and has kept me in suspense and wanting more! I can’t wait to see what you come up with next for a new series #KCACOLS

  6. Ooo I didn’t know you wrote fiction too! How exciting! Wasn’t it Charles Dickens who first printed his stories in weekly installments in the newspaper? It definitely adds to the suspense! #blogcrush

  7. I thought I’d already commented on this but obviously not? This is a great piece of fiction, you really drew me into the story and I would love to find out more. Xx #kcacols

  8. I used to write fiction when I was younger but only focus on the blog now! well done for such an intriguing piece! #KCACOLS

  9. Amazing! I too find writing soothes my life and keeps me sane, well kind of! Well done you. #KCACOLS

  10. This is great. More and more lately I have been thinking about getting back into fiction writing. Seeing posts like this really get my motivation back into swing. #kcacols

  11. Ooh how lush is it when you’re really excited to to get it all down on ‘paper’! Keep going πŸ™‚ #KCACOLS

  12. I was waiting to read the rest, having read last week’s! You should definitely put this together as a separate novella. I love your style Tracey! #KCACOLS

  13. Nice read, I am unsure of your audience as I haven’t read your other installments: I’m guessing older teen #KCACOLS

  14. Really good. I’ve tried writing some fiction in the past but hadn’t thought of putting it on my blog. Now you’ve got me thinking!

  15. Ohh it’s interesting to read a short chapter like this, I usually burn through books so quickly but this keeps you in suspense! x #kcacols

  16. I’m loving the story…looking forward to the next instalment! If you are interested in a bit of critique I would stick with one person’s point of view per chapter/instalment. This one starts with Ariel and then switches to Jonny which can be a bit confusing? Great story though..full of suspense and great characters πŸ™‚ #KCACOLS

  17. You write so well, will have to go back and read the whole story when I don’t have a toddler clambering on me haha! #KCACOLS

  18. Love it. I like your writing style. (It’s spoken to Steve not spoke I think!?- sorry, but you did say you were open to criticism πŸ˜‰ It’s not criticism though, I thought the creative writing was brilliant. Nice one. #kcacols

  19. I do a short story link up on the first of the month (100 words exactly or less than 30 words) – it’s live now if you want to join in. I also often put up writing competitions on my fb page if you’re interested. I’m off to read the other parts #KCACOLS

  20. I always enjoy reading your work. I am pleased to see the phrase “wittering on” as I use that a lot but rarely see it in print! #KCACOLS

  21. I love your descriptions, you really put the reader in touch with your writing and feeling every emotion #KCACOLS